Lucky for me my parents were both “I didn’t save anything for retirement, my kids will take care of me when I’m older”, so I don’t have to suffer through this.

  • JonsJava@lemmy.world
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    11 hours ago

    My dad - who was an amazingly racist conspiracy theorist - gave all his money to 2 redhead women he started fucking after divorcing the woman he married after my mom died.

    He chose not to leave me anything because I called him out for using the “n” word any time he talked about African Americans.

    I’m out $150k

    He is out having a legacy. My kids will never know his name, story, or hate.

    • nickiwest@lemmy.world
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      7 hours ago

      Congratulations on being a decent person even though your role model was not. It’s hard to break that cycle.

    • luciferofastora@lemmy.zip
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      10 hours ago

      Well, at least he fathered a decent kid, it seems. I don’t think it was his intention for you to turn out so decent, so I wouldn’t give him credit for that, but I guess he did something right despite all his efforts.

      • itsprobablyfine@sh.itjust.works
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        2 hours ago

        No this reasoning is flawed and used as an excuse for bad behavior. My father justified his alcoholism to himself by pointing out how independent all the kids turned out since he was useless, or how good we were with money because we could sense a scam from a young age as he was always trying to scam/manipulate us.

        You can teach someone to cross the road by explaining the dangers and process to them, or you can teach them by driving enough cars into them that they either figure it out themselves (and carry the scars forever) or die. That doesn’t make you a good teacher

      • Valmond@lemmy.world
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        9 hours ago

        No, some people just raise up to the task.

        I hate this idea that parents “did something good” if they are pieces of shit but their kids turn out good. Especially if there is no evidence of it. Why people feel the need to do that is a mystery for me, like protecting the bad guy at any cost.