alternative post title: how can I grow a thicker skin, so I simply stop caring what my coworkers think or say?

I’m still looking for a drama free workplace and I don’t understand why people seem to enjoy creating chaos out of nowhere

Working in several industries, I’ve met:

  • white Christian nationalist: too many Arabs and Mexicans in our country, somebody should send them all back to where they belong, and I’m very Christian. This was 5 minutes after meeting me for the first time. Why even tell this to a coworker?

  • Married woman complaining to me about how her husband isn’t so affectionate nowadays: 2 minutes after meeting me for the first time. Who does that? Shouldn’t you tell this to somebody you trust, like a friend and not a stranger you met 2 minutes ago?

  • An anti vaxxer trying to convert me to his cause, or however you want to call it.

  • And just today: ‘it’s good that Trump was shot’ Why would a sane person blurt that out in the middle of our pause for everyone to hear you? Why do you need to antagonize your coworkers? This was a manager btw.

I have waaaaay more examples, but I’ll keep it simple.

I just want to work and go home. Completely drama free. I don’t want to care what coworkers think, but apparently I’m very thin skinned and I’m easy to be triggered. Each of the examples I wrote triggered me: I wanted to yell ‘fck off, you piece of sht, I don’t give a f*ck what you think, leave me alone’, or something like that. But I need the job.

My conundrum: If this happens at every workplace, wouldn’t it make more sense to stay with the devil you know?

Unless, of course, you’ve job hopped till you found a drama free workplace… please tell me how you did it.

I want to be the old guy who doesn’t give a f*ck about stuff like this, yet it still triggers me.

  • CharlesReed@kbin.run
    3·
    4 months ago

    The only times I’ve ever had a drama free workplace was:

    1. At the beginning of my career when I was an intern. They didn’t care enough about me to include me in the gossip, and I was only going to be there for a few months anyway.
    2. When my last job started letting us work from home, so I was no longer stuck at a desk in a high traffic area where multiple people would stop and chat. Headphones with a mic were a godsend, because when someone would start to approach, I’d just smile and point at the mic. Kept a lot of the gossipers at bay, though not all. WFH eliminated all that, I was so happy I could finally just focus on my work and not get caught up in situations that didn’t even pertain to me.